Being a divorce lawyer can be a ridiculously stressful and soul sucking job. At the same time, there are real things we can do to
avoid the soul sucking part.
For most of us, we want to serve our clients well, deliver great results, and earn a good income. We also want to avoid being consumed by it all. The best divorce lawyers are able to make and keep their clients happy, live rewarding lives where they feel they have contributed to the betterment of families, earn a good living, and maintain their health and important relationships.
What I am suggesting here is that it is possible to have it all. A great life, a great income, and all the while serving our clients with success.
Val's recipe on how to be the best divorce lawyer has two elements:
1. Structure and Systematize your law practice. We need to work on our law practice, not just in it.
2. Have a practice or discipline of sorts, whether that is meditation, a forgiveness practice, yoga, thai chi, or a spiritual practice; whatever it is, it is something that is meant to bring us out of our own heads, and back to understanding we are here to serve.
In order to enjoy success as a lawyer, we have to run our cases well and keep our clients happy and well taken care of. On top of this we have to keep our staff happy and well taken care of. Finally, we need to earn enough money to make it all worth it for us.
In order to make it all work and run smoothly, we have to have systems in place to make sure our clients' needs are met every time they come in contact with our law firm.
At our law firm, Hemminger Law Group Westshore we are checklist maniacs. We have checklists, precedents, and scripts for almost everything we do:
We are not suggesting for a second that we turn ourselves and our support staff into robots blindly following checklists and instructions. We do, however, know that if we follow the checklists and precedents, we will be able to bring our clients' cases to successful completion, with a sense of calm, order and effectiveness. We will free up our thoughts, minds, and hearts to be fully represent for each and every client and what they need. This means better success in mediation, better success at negotiation, and better success at court.
Having a spiritual practice is the kind of thing that used to make me roll my eyes. To say I thought it was flaky and strictly best left to the Birkenstock-wearing, dread-lock sporting, and Patchouli-oil smelling set is an understatement. Spiritual practice? Puh-leeease. That was not for me.
Then, when my life and being fell deeply into the toilet, my psychologist (of all people) made a life changing suggestion. He said, "start a forgiveness practice. And see what happens."
So, I decided to follow his advice. Within something like a day (a couple of sessions at my forgiveness practice), my life, my hurt, my perspective, and my heart began to turn around.
Although I started with the practice in a form called Ho'oponopono, my practice has since changed and evolved into something different and more personal to me. Ever since I started a forgiveness practice, the results in my life have been profound. Knock-it-out-of-the-park profound.
It is the single most powerful and effective strategy that has improved not only my life, but that of my family's and staff. It has made me a more effective lawyer in a huge way.
Is my life perfect? Nope. Far from it. I still have those days where living in the trenches of family law are beyond tough. While I can say that most of the time I succeed, there are those days where something does not go well in court, or something does not go well in my client relationship.
My forgiveness practice has helped me transform these such Sh*##y experiences into being able to be the best divorce lawyer I can be.
Val has created this website to share with her colleagues. She is not suggesting, by any means, that she is the best divorce lawyer out there. She is, however, suggesting that she is the best divorce lawyer that she herself can be. Feel free to share anything you find useful.